


Affection

by s0mmerspr0ssen



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Platonic Kissing, Platonic Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-12
Updated: 2011-09-12
Packaged: 2017-10-23 16:27:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/252416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/s0mmerspr0ssen/pseuds/s0mmerspr0ssen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>People talk, of course.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Affection

**Author's Note:**

> For [this prompt](http://sherlockbbc-fic.livejournal.com/9640.html?thread=45881768#t45881768), asking for platonic kissing between John and Sherlock.

People talk, of course.

What else would they do with their boring, useless lives than watch others and gossip about them and feel disgustingly pleased about their own _normal_ existences?

It's not that it bothers Sherlock - never that. But he is afraid it will have an impact. An impact on _John_.

Pacing restlessly through the flat, Sherlock makes his way over to one of the living room windows, eventually staring down at the people walking up and down Baker Street.

Unlike Sherlock, John _cares_. Unlike Sherlock, John _listens_ to what other people say. Unlike Sherlock, John gets hurt by idiotic comments and odd looks and one day, one day he'll stop doing this because it's _weird_ and _freaky_ and-

A warm pressure on his left cheek cuts right through Sherlock's train of thought. Lips. Very familiar lips.

"You seem worried."

John's voice is like a soft blanket or a particularly comfortable jumper - instantly soothing, instantly calming, something to be wrapped up in when the world seems especially cold. It takes all of Sherlock's self-control not to turn his head and press his cheek against John's, to seek further contact.

"Nonsense," he says dismissively, hating the cold disdain in his voice that doesn't go at all with the warm tingling on his left cheek.

He doesn't realise he's been clutching the curtains ever so tightly until John moves and persistent fingers gently try and unwrap Sherlock's iron fist.

"Is it?" John replies easily.

Soon enough, it's John's fingers Sherlock is clutching, not the rough fabric of the curtains. Sherlock isn't looking at John but it feels good, it feels - _right_. It should be this way, it should. This is _good_.

But it's not normal.

"We shouldn't be doing this," Sherlock snaps and feels John jump a bit next to him.

He hasn't intended to sound this hurtful. Panicking, Sherlock clutches John's hand tighter.

_Don't let go don't let go don't let go please._

"Says who?"

John's voice has become defensive. He doesn't try to move his hand, though. Instead, he's leaning closer, his shoulder brushing into Sherlock's side.

"Everybody," Sherlock continues. "Don't pretend you haven't heard them talk."

"Since when do _you_ listen to anybody's talking?"

"I don't. _I don't care._ "

Sherlock can practically see John's soft smile, completely without having to actually look at him. He's seen that smile a lot: slightly exasperated though infinitely patient, accompanied by fine wrinkles around his eyes and a slightly twitching nose.

"Why worry about it, then?"

Sherlock swallows. He shouldn't tell him. If they don't talk about it, John might not stop so soon. Sherlock could have this for a bit longer, even just a little while, until it gets too much and John decides it's not what a bloke should do.

But when it comes to John, Sherlock cannot be selfish. He wants to be - oh, _so very_ much - but that isn't fair. What they're doing, it's not - it's not normal and it'll keep John from having _proper_ relationships with other people and he needs those, he won't be happy otherwise, will he?

"You - _you_ do," Sherlock breathes. " _You_ care."

John doesn't reply immediately.

In fact, it takes him two minutes and thirty-seven seconds to react with anything beyond a slightly messed-up breathing pattern.

Then, his fingers move, determinately slipping from Sherlock's tight clasp.

_I knew it I knew it he'll stop he'll stop I'm stupid I'm stupid why couldn't I keep my mouth shut why why why_

But John doesn't let go completely. In fact, he's now lifting Sherlock's hand up and Sherlock can't not look, he has to turn. And he does, just in time to watch John place a soft kiss on the back of Sherlock's hand.

"John," Sherlock whispers, though John doesn't reply. Not with words, he doesn't.

Instead, John kisses the little knob on Sherlock's wrist; steps closer; lets go of Sherlock's hand in favour of cupping Sherlock's face.

A kiss for Sherlock's forehead.

A kiss for Sherlock's nose.

A kiss for the little birthmark above Sherlock's left eyebrow.

And finally, a kiss for Sherlock's lips.

"I care," John says, "about _you_."

He smiles. God, his smile. John. _Johnjohnjohnjohnjohn._

"I suppose this is a bit weird," he continues, clearly thinking out loud. His face is still very close to Sherlock's - Sherlock can feel John's warm breath meet his skin as he talks. "But it feels good, doesn't it? Being close to each other? Touching?"

Mutely, Sherlock nods. He doesn't want to destroy the moment with another stupid, snappish comment. He wishes he could trust himself not to, to say something lovely instead, something _worthy_ of this thing they have between them, something worthy of everything that is John.

Because John is brilliant and beautiful and the kindest person Sherlock has ever known to put up with this, to put up with platonic kissing and hand-holding and cuddles and all those thing you _should not be doing_ unless the other is your partner or you are two teenage girls and best friends at that.

"I think so, too," John continues and, maybe just because he can, he places another kiss on Sherlock's lips. "It's good. And that's why I'll keep doing it, unless you want me to stop. I couldn't care less what everybody else is saying. To be frank, I don't think it's quite fair, that women can be all over each other without being called lesbians, but as soon as two blokes share a bit of physical contact it's _ever so homosexual..._ "

But Sherlock has stopped listening because now, John is ranting at the world at large and as much as he adores his best friend, Sherlock tires quickly of John's little speeches. But John is still very close, practically leaning against Sherlock's chest now and that's nice, that's perfect.

Sherlock still thinks that John does care and sometimes, John might even think about stopping this or taking a break. But the fact that he doesn't - it's _mind-blowing_. It's so _brilliant_ , so much more brilliant than all the things Sherlock can deduce.

 _Let people talk,_ Sherlock thinks and buries his face in John's hair.  
_____  
 _fin._

**Author's Note:**

> There's podfic for this fic, thanks to the awesome [kholly](http://kholly.livejournal.com). Look below for the link!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [[Podfic of] Affection by S0mmerspr0ssen](https://archiveofourown.org/works/327873) by [kholly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kholly/pseuds/kholly)




End file.
